Chomp, Chomp

I have been pathetically lacking on my updates, sorry bout that. I am back, and in decent form ;)
Ok actually I feel like ass, but I hated to start off on a negative note. I think I have a combo of PMS and something else that mildly resembles the flu (no, not swine flu). And I'm here alone with the kids while husband is away. Good times! Moving on.

I've been saying since we moved to Florida that I want to see a gator "in the wild". Our subdivision has 5 or 6 "lakes" (in WV, it's known as a small pond ;) ), and they have signs about not feeding the alligators at a couple. I have yet to figure out if this is to be cute, if it's purely for decoration, to possibly avoid a lawsuit, or what. But I have yet to see an alligator in there, or anything resembling it.

So this past weekend, we take a day trip to a state park for daughters Girl Scouts. the park was very neat- the neatest thing being that it is an island, and that it used to be completely swarmed with snails, which is what the residents (Indians) lived off of. Now, the entire island is covered in snail shells. I had to threaten daughter with jail time for removing state park property, just to avoid coming home with 1000 empty snail shells- all of which looked alike ;)

We ride the ferry (like a 15 second ride) to the island, and eat our lunch, let the girls play ,etc. Our "outdoorsy" mom as I like to call her, suggests that we go canoeing. And I agree.

Why? Someone, tell me why.

There were 3 adults and 3 girls that went, and knowing that I could not maneuver a canoe on my own (seeing as how I've never set butt in one), one of the moms comes with me and daughter. They untie us, and we immediately start drifting backwards, into the bank. 10 minutes later, we inch forward out into the open channel.

From there, it's about 20 minutes of screaming, lots of drifting towards the bank, and TONS of circles- no forward movement, just circles. It was quite humorous, and annoying all at once.

Fast forward about 15 more minutes and we finally develop a rhythm. We head down the river, and I see a "dead head" (log) sticking out in the water, and we're drifting towards it. But then...what the.. all of the sudden , the log starts swimming.

And it's a gator.

We, the useless canoe operators, are drifting right towards what is, in my opinion, a very large gator. Very large.

Team work becomes priority all of the sudden, and out of nowhere we learn (quite quickly!) how to stop, and reverse, and get the hell out of dodge.

Escaping what could have been a potentially bad situation, we head the opposite direction on the river. And not 5 minutes in, there's another one, sunbathing. Needless to say, that was the end of my first (and most likely last) canoe trip. We later learned that it's mating season, and that's it's a good idea to avoid them because in the park rangers words, they are "quite hostile".

WTF? She didn't feel the need to tell me this BEFORE I almost turned myself into some reptiles lunch? Where were the signs for this? Or are we the only idiots who actually rent those canoes?

Anyway, I'm back unscathed, and now I can say that I have officially met my first FL gator- almost too close for comfort, and without my camera, but I still have the possibility of recurring nightmares to keep it fresh in my memory. ;)

In other news, I'm currently searching for "the" perfect dress to wear to a wedding, in addition to 2 outfits to wear to daughters dance recital. I have some time to work with, but apparently not the body to work with. Since when did I become so much bigger than I used to be? Or maybe clothes became MUCH smaller? ;)

The good thing is Newport News and Speigel both have sections on their websites specifically called "What to wear to a wedding". Beyond that, they even have them divided out into categories (beach, city, etc). So why can't I squeeze my arse into something cute? Who knows. Still waiting on that miracle diet cure here people! ;)

Ahhhh...

*~Sorry if you had this blog emailed to you, I forgot to change my settings!

Ahhhh the smell of an almost clean house, so refreshing to my nose on a spring day (night). :) It's been awhile since my house has been this clean- the sad part is that by my normal standards, it's really not that clean. But I actually mopped tonight, Go me!

I'm still debating the whole skydiving thing. I have this ridiculous idea that maybe if I "debate" long enough, I'll call to make an appointment and someone will have already taken it. Which may already be true. Oh please let it be true ;)

It's kind of one of those things where you just KNOW you want to do it, but don't want to do it, but will regret it if you don't do it. I know I will regret it if I take my dad up there and watch him (which I plan on doing), and don't do it myself. And if I don't go with him, or before him or whatever, I know I never will. Since having kids, gone are my days of wild hairs where I wake up and decide to do something ridiculous. :)

I don't know why I started thinking about it again- it has been lingering in the back of my mind since he suggested it, but tonight I started thinking about it again. I was trying to figure out what is the main part of it that leaves me uneasy, in hopes that I could sit here and have a silent conversation with myself that may sway my decision in one way or the other. But it was at that point that I realized that it's the ENTIRE process that freaks me. The going to bed the night before (or maybe the week before!), knowing what I would be doing at 8am the next day (who jumps out of a plane at 8am?! It's the only appt that they have left that day, dad's is at 9am). The getting up that day knowing what I'm doing, the nerve racking ride there, knowing what I'm doing, filling out that paperwork, knowing what I'm doing...do you get my point here??

So I decided to check out the website again, just because. Feel free to check it out yourself HERE. While browsing, I came along a link that said "watch tandem video". I watched this, thinking it may ease some of my fears, and I kid you not when I say that my entire body broke out into a sweat. My stomach had butterflies. My palms were sweating, even the bottoms of my FEET were sweating. I was a nervous, nauseated, disgusting mess, right here on my couch. Sounds promising, no? ;)

First off, I knew it would not be a jump out of a 747, but it's one of those shoddy planes that I've sworn never to get into, because well when a plane doesn't make it, and makes the nightly news instead, it's typically one of those kind. I guess the upside would be that if anything bad seems to be happening to the plane, you're already attached to a chute. HA. It is from that point I decided that I would possibly do this, but not without the assistance of a Valium. Then, the video progresses, and they are REALLY high up in the plane (this place advertises the highest jump in FL- 15,000 feet if I remember correctly)and the guy says "Ok, we're about halfway!"

Yikes.

Not only do I hate planes- yes, a plane ride in itself requires a Valium*, and that's when I plan on just sitting perfectly still, buckled in my seat, and commanding that all others around me do the same. Seriously, no one on a plane near me can get up and move around, it totally freaks me - but I also hate heights, and I am just not sure if I'm ready to come out of a puddle jumper plane attached to some strange man, 3 miles up in the air at 8am. Ugh. Decisions.

I think my last big hurdles are the obvious- what if there is an equipment problem? I plan on calling them to ask if someone else jumps out with us- this will do a decent job of squashing that fear that if we have a problem, hopefully that other person can swoop over and we can hang all over him for dear life. I do feel better that it's tandem, because then I know the guy is extra careful since he's attached to me. LoL ;) The other would be if I have some sort of medical issue- what if I freak so bad I pass out, or puke, or have an anxiety attack with limited air at 15,000 feet. I've only had one anxiety attack my entire life, but I can assure you that it's something you DON'T want happening 3 miles in the air! Maybe I need 2 Valium..

Did I mention what you look like doing this? Sky diving is so not flattering to the face- that girl in the video looks like one of those dogs with 10,000 wrinkles! ;)

Ugh. I don't know if I've ever wanted to do, and not do, something so bad in my life. Other than give birth. ;) I can only hope that this would't last nearly as long, and do a lot less damage to my body..


*(For the record, I don't take Valium, my grandpa does and so if anything traumatic is upcoming, my grandma swipes one for me and mails it to me LOL ;) )

Up Up and Away

I have a slew of family coming to inhabit my house at the end of May for daughter's dance recital. This would include my mom, mother in law, 2 grandmas, and now my dad, who originally said he was not "traveling with that many hags" LOL. ;)

We really hadn't made many plans for that weekend that they will visit. Daughter has rehearsal when they get here Friday, and recital on both Saturday and Sunday, then they fly back out on Monday. So the weekend pretty much planned itself for us.

Except, for my dear ole dad.

I think that he has ants in his pants, or something similar, because he's just not content to be still. So he decided that in the mornings while he's here, that he wants to rent a scooter and go through St Augustine one day, and sky dive the other day. Yeah. Dive out of a plane, into the sky. Where the clouds and birds live.

I have to admit that sky diving has always been one of those things on "my list". I also have to admit that I've always lived within a 40min drive to a skydiving facility pretty much my entire life in one state or another, and have never had the balls to do it. So yeah, the opportunity has always been there and I've never taken advantage. Because I'm a sissy.

Dad invites me to go along with him, and I have no clue what to do. I am so NOT going to even try to be funny here and ask what is the worst that can happen, because the worst the can happen, is exactly what you DON'T want to hear is the worst that can happen in any situation. EVER.

Am I afraid of dying? Well, I'm certainly not looking forward to it, nor do I ever like to talk about it. I know that it happens, but still. So the idea of going in a plane (one of my biggest fears- HATE to fly), and then jumping out of it while attached to some stranger, and a backpack with a chute on a rope, it's pretty daunting. Ok, it's downright terrifying. Not only do I have two children and a husband, I am also nowhere near where I want/need to be on a spiritual aspect- which in part contributes to that never ending 20's identity crisis that I loathe. I have to make a decision soon, they only have one appointment left that day, an hour earlier than when dad goes. I don't know what is stopping me from being able to say yes or no, but at any rate I'm crazy for even considering it.

Maybe I'll just stay on the ground and photograph dad as he comes into view...or join in on the scooter trip ;)

Email me~

I was getting ready to do a few changes to my blog, when I realized that I'm not that great about figuring out some things on here. So if you're a regular reader of my blog and would like to continue doing so, will you please email me so that I can email you an invite? This blog is getting ready to go private :)

Thanks!

Shedding

After I finally came out on the other side of a terrible itching spell that made me feel like I was going CRAZY (!!!!the lovely post sunburn itch!!!!), I am finally shedding my poor ruined skin cells, and looking quite the lizard these days. I'm hoping this is my lesson to wear some frickin sunscreen next time, but in all honesty, people like me don't stand a chance in the FL sun. You go from Casper to Mr Crabs in 15 min flat. Ugh. At any rate, I can finally take a not cold shower (those soooo piss me off), and hopefully I won't have disgusting dead skin all over me soon enough ;)

We had a nice Easter, though I feel like a TOTAL loser for not having an Easter Bunny picture this year. Seriously, what is wrong with me? I have never missed one of those- Santa, Easter Bunny, you name it, I have one of the kids with him/her/it. So I'm feeling quit loser-ish for missing out on that. We did get some pictures of the kids outside when we got home though.

We ate a nice Easter brunch at a Marriott here. It was really pretty- it's where they hold The Players golf tournament each year. This doesn't interest me, but it does interest husband. Meh. ;)

I'm still not sure what made husband have the nerve to reserve at a place like this- son is nearly impossible to eat out with. I don't really know what we can do, short of just not eating out (and we are about there). He refuses to sit in his seat, he's loud, he's destructive, neither of us can enjoy our meal, etc etc. I don't know if I can paint you a good mental image of the theme of the day, but I'll try. We walk in to this pretty hotel, with this grand set up of food. There's every meat you can imagine, a very impressive salad spread with sushi and everything, all of the stuff that doesn't interest me since I have the eating habits of an overly picky 5 year old- not joking on that one. They did, however, have a "Create your own macaroni and cheese bar", a DREAM for me. I could have just hung out there all day ;)

Anyhow, we walk in to this place and the first thing I notice is that I see no other kids in the area, at all. Eventually some did come in later. We sit down and son is exhausted already, and in a bad mood, already. He starts to fuss, and proceeds to grab nearly everything on the table- multiple pieces of silver wear, saucers, sugar packets, he got it all. Once I cleared his immediate area, he decides to stand up in his chair (high chairs are a no go), grab a champagne glass, and slam it on the table. Only he really didn't slam it that hard, he just was trying to set it back down and didn't do it easy. How gentle can a 2 year old be anyhow? The champagne glass breaks immediately, at the stem, in his hand. GREAT. He looks at me like he's scared to death, and I quickly grab the broken glass out of his hand and start to pick the smaller pieces of glass out of his hand and off of the table. I think we managed to avoid any of it getting in his hand. From there, husband starts to panic and rather just explain what happened, he feels the need to destroy the evidence, and so he TAKES the freaking broken glass, and sticks it in his coat! This is all literally within the first 5 minutes of arriving at the place, set to a man playing violin in the background, we are all sweating and exhausted.

You would think that was enough, but we decided to eat anyhow. Son was of course full of junk since we took him to church, he's cutting teeth and we didn't even ATTEMPT to send him to the nursery. So he filled up on goldfish during the service, and obviously is in no mood to eat- thank goodness the kids were free. Whew. Boys I tell you, a totally opposite world of any baby experiences with daughter. We eventually give up, and husband takes him outside. Once mother in law is finished eating, she goes out there with him and he falls asleep on the couch in the patio area, while we eat a semi peaceful meal with daughter, in a rush. Ahhh family togetherness. Sort of. ;)

Tomorrow son will be 2, and I can't believe that this time 2 years ago, I was hanging out in the hospital, waiting on the start of my dreaded pitocin, for the second time in my life. It's amazing how different my two pregnancies were, but how similar both labors were. I can't believe that my "baby" is going to be 2- and more so, that this may be our last one. It's so crazy how fast time flies, and we don't even realize it. We have his party planned, complete with Blues Clues decorations and cake, and of course presents. I wanted to get him his own ride on battery powered car- like daughters Barbie jeep that he loves. So we got to the store to see if he like the truck, and he picked a red mustang instead ;) He literally went crazy over the thing, wanting it over all the others. I can't wait to see him in it tomorrow!

Ouchhhhhhh

The word Owwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww, was specifically invented for me.
I am one step away from being a char coaled, deep fried, pickled white girl. Seriously.

What made me decide that I was actually going to tan on my first day out in the real spring sun, on an island, in Florida?

I have NO clue.

But I am seriously hurtin' here people.

All pain aside for the moment, our trip to Tampa was nice. It was bitterly cold by FL standards when we got there on Wednesday, and warmer (though not by much) when we ventured out to Caledesi Island on Thursday. I have to say, to have been rated the #1 beach in America at some point by some person, I was not impressed. Maybe I was expected too much? I don't know. It was nice to try something different, but we could have had the same experience by just going to some local public access beach and saving ourselves the wait time and ferry fees. None the less, America's #1 beach scorched my ass and I would pay millions for a suit made completely of Aloe for the next week or so. Ouch.

Thursday night we went to the hockey game, a fun thing to do now and then. It gave me a birds eye view of where I will take daughter to see the Jonas Brothers later this year, and scope out hotels too. I had already reserved one, but found one even closer. The hockey game was fun, loud, and especially cold for someone whose skin temperature has to be at least 115 about now. ;) Yes, I'm whining. I blame myself though..

Mother in law will be here tomorrow to kick off round two of sons birthday festivities. I'm just hoping his Blues Clues decorations get here in time, or else they will be dealing with one red woman (figuratively and literally speaking!) HA!

On The Road Again

We have a few busy days coming up, so I may be scarce. My parents will be here in a couple of hours, and in the morning we're all leaving for Tampa. I am ready to get out of here and do something different,even if only for 2 nights. Thursday, we're taking my dad to his first (in person) professional hockey game, so that will be a blast. :) We're watching Tampa Bay play Washington DC Capitals- which happens to be the team we "root for" (DC). Hopefully Thursday it will warm back up and we can spend a day at one of Tampa's many beautiful beaches! I'm jonesin for some sunshine and crystal clear water. You definitely don't get the clear water on the east coast :)
We'll be home Friday, and mother in law will be here Saturday. I don't know how long she's staying. She's coming down for son's birthday, which is the 14th. I CANNOT believe my baby boy is going to be 2! It seems like just yesterday he was born. Oh, I feel so old! We'll be having a party, complete with Blues Clues decorations since that is what he is soooo into at the moment. It wasn't an easy task to find either, since it doesn't come on TV anymore.

I don't have much else to talk about really. I dyed my hair last night to cover up all of the greys that have snuck up one me- well, it's a LOT darker than I had planned. It's actually probably almost my natural color, but I haven't been this dark in awhile.

Seriously, I have nothing exciting to talk about. ;) Be back in a few days!

Am I A Buzz Kill?

I think I've been given a complex by a 6 year old.

Rewinding- last night daughter had a friend stay over from school. Great times for all of course- except for the mess that is left behind now, but I expected that much. Her friend came over at 7 last night and we let them play outside for awhile until it got dark. Husband helped them play baseball, soccer, etc., and I stayed close by son trying to keep him occupied.

Later that night I came into daughters room to tell her it was time to settle down for the night, and I find them in full dress up gear, rocking out to Hannah Montana. I closed the door and started to walk down the hall and I hear

Daughter: "That was SO embarrassing"

Friend: "What?"

Daughter: "My mom seeing us dance like that"

Friend: "Oh, I know. Hey, your daddy is really nice!"

Daughter: "I know"


What?! I am the uncool mom? Am I going to be the mom that every one of my kids friends hate? You know, the mom that is the total buzz kill who is always grouchy. Sheesh, is that me and I had no clue? Ugh. I surely hope not. I happen to think I am pretty cool, especially considering the age difference between me and daughters friends is about the same as me and most of her friends moms. But maybe I am old and not cool and I just had no idea. Thanks a lot, 6 year olds, for making me feel like the old witch with the wart on my nose.

Leaving that rant and moving on to the next one... I'll spare you all of the details of my dilemmas, but I am reaching a point where I'm utterly fed up with husband. It's a long story with a lot of history that I doubt I will EVER find the time to explain on here, but while we are talking about buzz kills, if ever I had one, he is it. (And I'm not referring to anything abusive or anything like that) So think of me now and then as I constantly battle with myself in my head over what I am doing with my life and myself. I tell you, since we have moved here I have been going through a serious identity crisis. I hear that happens in your 20's. I never believed it before, but I do now. I think growing up so close to family, I've sort of defined who I am by who I was surrounded with and where we were. Now that absolutely everything in my life is different, I have no idea who I am. Seriously. All of this has left with me with lots of stress and feeling like I have no time for myself. I know something has to change, soon, somewhere.